Meet the Feminist Who Gave Us “Ms.”
Hello All,
Welcome! If you’re new here, this is the final part of our Let’s Talk About the F Word: Feminism series. If you missed them, feel free to catch up on Part One: What is Feminism and Part Two: What Does Feminism Have to Do with Personal Finance.
As we wrap up this series, I want to share a personal story that ties deeply to my own connection to feminism. It’s about my father’s cousin, Shelia Michaels.
Shelia lived down the street from me while I was growing up and joined our immediate family for holidays and traditions. As a kid, I was captivated by her vibrant stories—everything from driving a cab in New York City’s Meatpacking District to being jailed as a Freedom Fighter in the Civil Rights Movement.
Shelia led a fascinating, full life, and I was lucky to have her in my corner. She encouraged my curiosity and independence and was overjoyed when I decided to attend Wellesley College. When I graduated, she flew to the East Coast to celebrate with me—a memory I treasure.
Her legacy, however, extends far beyond our family. Shelia popularized the term Ms. Here’s the NYTimes article about her life. As a feminist, Shelia was searching for an honorific that didn’t tie a woman’s identity to her marital status—a term that, like “Mr.,” reflected individuality and equality.
Think about it: Men maintain their surnames and titles regardless of marital status, but women have historically been labeled based on their relationship to a man. How revolutionary and freeing it is to have the term Ms to address this imbalance!
When I got married, I chose to keep my maiden name and I still use Ms whenever possible. For me, it’s a nod to Shelia’s legacy and a recognition of the gift of personal identity—separate from my relationship status. While I know this is a deeply personal choice, I’m grateful to have the option at all.
Feminism has taught me that the ability to choose is a victory in itself.
Reflecting on Feminism and Your Choices
As we wrap up this series, I hope it has encouraged you to reflect on how feminism has shaped the choices and opportunities in your life. Feminism isn’t just about monumental societal changes; it’s about the ripple effects those changes create in our day-to-day lives—such as the freedoms we have to make decisions about our careers, relationships, and personal identities.
Here are some questions to reflect on as you consider the role feminism has played in your journey:
What opportunities do you have today that wouldn’t have been possible without feminist advocacy? Think about your career, education, and personal freedoms. Able to take out a loan (mortgage, car loan, etc) alone? You can thank the Equal Credit Opportunity Act!
How have you embraced choices that reflect your values and independence? Whether it’s about your financial life, personal identity, or family dynamics, what stands out?
In what ways can you honor the progress made while advocating for further equality? Are there small but impactful steps you can take to support others or push for systemic change? Perhaps it's a courageous conversation with someone about how feminism has positively impacted your life choices.
Feminism is about expanding choices—not dictating them—and allowing each of us to carve our own path. I’d love to hear your thoughts: How has feminism shaped you? What opportunities are you grateful for, and what progress do you hope to see next?
Onward,
Ariel
